Should I Message Again on Tinder

Hi Em,

Most of my messages have the attributes yous discussed in your articles on messaging. So my question is, if I don't go a reply, is there any follow up message that might trigger a reply? Or is information technology a dead consequence?

Thanks,
Ben

Thanks for your question, Ben!  Lots of guys are curious about this.  The short answer is: it depends.

First, decide if it's a good use of your time and endeavor to message someone a woman a 2nd time when she didn't reply to your first effort.  And then, write a message she can't ignore.  Here'south how:

1) Double-bank check that the two of you are a good fit on a basic level

A adult female's profile is filled with important clues that suggest whether or not she might message y'all dorsum.  Some things nosotros'll never know -- similar if she has a "type" or if she merely started seeing someone else.  But at that place are a few details in a adult female's profile thatcan tell you if there's a take a chance she might non respond.  Go to her contour and look for:

Your Friction match %

Here's the dominion of thumb: seventy% Match or more than? Get for it. Less than seventy%? Proceed with caution.

A low Match % tin can be an immediate disqualifier. If it's lower than 70%, this usually points to serious differences in values, politics, organized religion, lifestyle habits, etc. These things affair when you lot're looking to enjoy someone's company for the long term.

A low Lucifer % is a useful red flag foryou– don't waste your fourth dimension on this girl! – and women use it the aforementioned way. We expect at this number as a quick way to ID and delete the guys who probably messaged united states based on looks, rather than being a good fit in the areas that are important.

Differences in Lifestyle & Values

Is i of you lot a smoker while the other is non?  How near opposite habits in drinking or drug utilize?  What about your politics or organized religion?  Does she want kids while y'all don't?  Again, large differences in your values or lifestyle could exist the reason why she did not reply to the offset message.

Distance

In full general, we want to run into someone who is close-by.  If you're OK with long-distance, or even just driving 1+ hours to see her, know that she might not be willing to practise the same. If you desire to message her anyway, make certain your bulletin volition make her see what she stands to proceeds by replying!

Historic period Range

Y'all know what age rangeyou're looking for, but you also need to ostend that yous're within the age range thatshe'due southlooking for. If you're 2-3 years outside the age bracket she specified, proceed with caution. If a guy's more than 5 years out, she'll probably ignore his message completely.

Height

While some girls don't listen existence taller than guys, other girls are bothered by this. Avoid a height divergence of more than than 1-2".

2) Review your own start message and profile. Wouldyou message yous back?

Whether or non you wrote a peachy first bulletin will impact her desire to answer to your second message.

Check out what you wrote to her initially. Did you brand an attempt in your showtime bulletin to showtime the conversation other guys tin't?  Did y'all find common ground in her profile and inquire her a question about something she said that was interesting to you lot?  Did you genuinely try to start a conversation by being curious virtually her thoughts, opinions, life choices, or passions?

So, have a look at your own profile.  Practise y'all need to share more about yourself and so that SHE tin run into that you're a good fit for her?  Cheque out this article on how to write a cracking online dating profile to make sure yous're doing yourself justice.

3) Decide to write a greatsecond message.

Y'all're up against plenty of guys who take disregarded the basic details of her profile and wrote lazy first messages.  In club to stand apart from these more selfish men, you take to brand it clear y'all're contacting her over again thoughtfully and for good reason.

Brand a Personal Connection

Yous demand to make the connection for her to bear witness her you're thoughtful and truly a good match.  Check out her profile to detect something that is important to her, which you lot connect on.  Don't choose the easy route the second time around.

For instance, maybe her contour says, "I have a weakness for people who make me express joy, who will volunteer with me, and believe in giving back."

Allow's say you connect with all of what she'due south proverb.  The like shooting fish in a barrel road here is to go for the "brand me express joy" strategy.  Guys who want to make a minimal try volition message her with a joke, or worse -- buttell her that they likewise believe humor is essential in life.  Anyone could do either of these things, just neither will helpyou make apersonal connectedness with her showing how and why your values align.

On the flip side, yous could make an effort to connect with her thoughtfully. Start past recognizing why she may non take replied to your first message and so starting time a conversation.  That bulletin could look like:

"I realize Eugene is a bit further than you wanted to travel out of Portland, but we have a few important things in common so I thought I'd reach out one more fourth dimension. Volunteering has been a large part of my life, and I see that it is in your life also. (Then, say one short affair most why you lot believe it'due south of import to y'all...Then enquire a question about why this is for her, what it means to her, etc.)"

Be cursory and polite, but exist very thoughtful and make it articulate that you're non simply messaging her once again based on looks simply!

E'er, Always Inquire a Question

If you're emailing a second fourth dimension, it's too absolutely disquisitional that you lot endeavor to brainstorm a chat that asks for her thoughts or opinions with a question that requires more than than a yes/no response.

A swell trick to asking questions that get to deeper sharing and bear witness you're interested in her thoughts, feelings, and opinions, is to ask "why," "what," and "how?"  These enquire for more than a yep/no answer, and dig much deeper than asking how someone's weekend was spent.  When you lot ask questions like these, you'll start a conversation that proves you want to go to know her -- and whatever makes her who she is.

So many men ask shallow questions that don't testify an interest in a woman's thoughts, opinions, or the reasons WHY she enjoys her hobbies, chore, or doing the things she loves.  It's usually an indicator that they didn't really read her profile or don't care about much other than her looks!  Just when You lot inquire a question that shows you read what she wrote, found information technology interesting, and desire to know more than virtually WHY she gets excited nearly sure things, or what motivates her -- then that's really flattering.  Yous'll really stand out from other men when yous testify yous tin practise that.

Request questions like these are disquisitional in the first (or second) message, and as you lot continue the conversation --earlier asking her out.  This volition be engaging for her -- and she'll feel more than comfortable that you're truly interested in her for all she has to offering, not just a physical connectedness.

3) Hit Send & Allow it Go

If it works, fantastic!  Continue to lead the conversation in a style that helps you both acquire nearly the other.  By the time y'all become to the get-go date, you'll have so much to talk most, information technology'll be more fun and less awkward for both of you.

If it does not piece of work, then at to the lowest degree yous know you lot did your best to prove her the genuine connection y'all 2 might have, and that she may have her own reason for non responding.  Possibly she likes guys with beards, or blond guys, or another random preference!  Beloved is a funny matter, and if this one is not the partner you're looking for, yous can bet she's on her way to you. Get back out there and find her!

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Source: https://beyondages.com/message-again-even-if-no-response-to-first-message/

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